Have you ever wanted to read something you wrote?  Then open a blog because that’s why they invented them, numbnuts.  However, if you want to wait a while before you read something you wrote so that it sounds interesting or poignant go HERE to the EMAIL TIME CAPSULE.  I sent myself this gem destined for 2025:

Re: Hey, how’s it goin.

Msg: Hope you didn’t fuck it all up.

And it’s true. 

Okay okay.  I’m going to post a link here, and I’m going to tell you upfront that it’s the funniest shit you’ve ever seen.  You’re going to go watch all of these movies — whether you like them at first or not.  Then if you don’t like them, I want you to never talk to me again.

Space Investigators

Start from the beginning. Watch every episode.

Looks like a Mr. Herrera has been behaving badly in Texas.

Click Here.

I will not confirm or deny whether or not I have ever been to Texas and also walked in Texas Mud, but I will say that that looks like my style.

Fuck tipping.  Fuck waitresses.  Fuck you.  None of them deserve it.  I only hope one day to tip on the level of Bruce Willis.